2000-01-05-Grieving Your Own Passing
Butler PA #82
• 1 Heading
o 1.1 Topic: Grieving Your Own Passing
o 1.2 Group: Butler TeaM
• 2 Facilitators
o 2.1 Teacher: Tomas
o 2.2 TR: Gerdean
• 3 Session
o 3.1 Dialogue
o 3.2 Closing
Topic: Grieving Your Own Passing
Group: Butler TeaM
GERDEAN: I have a question for Tomas that I gleaned a week or so ago. Thoroah and I just read from page 2014 and 2015 of the text in the paper The Time of the Tomb, under the section During the Sabbath Day, beginning with “We are not able fully to explain …” – that paragraph. And the question is: When Jesus said goodbye to his spirit, “Unto your hands I commend my spirit,” he said. They, the Midwayers, discussed not knowing exactly what he was giving up. Could you discuss this or elaborate on this a little bit, Tomas?
TOMAS: When have I not been eager to discuss anything with you that you have brought to my attention? Almost always. And thus I would be happy to discuss this with you, but since you don’t pose to me a question, I will not respond as if you had, but rather I will ask you, Gerdean, why do you ask?
GERDEAN: Maybe because I’m a mortal and I was thinking the other day about my ego identity, my personality. You discussed personality earlier. I can see being on my death bed and saying, “Father, unto your hands I commend my spirit,” and I see why the Midwayers would focus on spirit, but I also, as a human, am very tenderly attached to my existence here. I would cease to exist as a human being.
I would somehow want what I had contributed, or become, or experienced, or grappled with, to be made honorable somehow. I suppose that goes into the great beyond with me, as my value, but it’s in a different state. It’s no longer in the human state. Somehow the human has an identity separate and different from the morontia reality. It has to, because in the morontia worlds we don’t have the same concerns.
I’ve seen people who have died or committed suicide or had not made what I would consider ANY decisions as to their spiritual destiny, but I realize that much of their good is assimilated into the evolving Supreme somehow. That when the person ceases to exist, their good stuff is somehow made part of the Evolving Supreme. Maybe just because of the human no longer existing. My perception on that can be completely in error, because I’m looking at it from my human mind.
But I was kind of feeling like Jesus the other day. Ha. For some reason, and lamenting the potential loss of my Self. In a context that I can’t even put my finger on. And I didn’t think you were going to ask me to say WHY I wanted to know. I don’t know that I’d thought it all the way through as to why I wanted to know. I wanted you to fix it for me. So, I asked you to discuss it.
TOMAS: : Yes, now we have something to discuss. And, yes, I can identify with what you are expressing, daughter, because I, too, was mortal and at one point faced that precise moment you speak of, and indeed it is a letting go of what was a viable reality and which will be no more. You are correct. And your sense of grieving your own passing is to your credit, child, for it indicates you have learned to love yourself. You have accepted your humanness and find it of value.
It is my contention that it must have been that Jesus felt that same longing, even though his life, like yours, was not entirely a bed of roses, and moments exist which present humiliation and pain, but still the miracle of experiencing life is worthy of noting its passage.
TOMAS: Now rise up and fear not, but rejoice in the day the Lord has made. Be glad in it and give fragrance to it.
GERDEAN: Thank you, Tomas.