2009-02-15. Loyalty
Rio Rancho #166
Topic: Loyalty
Group: Rio Rancho TeaM
Teacher: Tomas, Merium
TR: Gerdean
Opening
- Music: Elena on piano: “Holy, Holy, Holy”
TOMAS: Good afternoon, my friends. I am Tomas, your teacher.
Group: Hey, Tomas.
TOMAS: Before we commence I would like for Merium to lead us in prayer so as to be focused for our purpose this afternoon.
MERIUM: Let us lift up our voice in praise of Holy Trinity — Universal Father, Eternal Son, and Infinite Spirit — the Holy Family, indeed. With them reside all the secrets of the origin and destiny of all the worlds of time and space. They uphold the universe and at the same time, they know the secret places in our hearts.
We look to our Eternal Parents as children look to their earthly parents, to provide our needs, answer our questions, heal our wounds and relieve us of our cares. We ask their guidance as they continue to nourish us and cultivate us as the sons and daughters they would have us be. May we all be focused then, this afternoon, on that Spirit that prevails in and among them, and as it reflects in and among us here gathered. Amen.
Group: Amen.
Lesson
TOMAS: I would like to talk a little bit this afternoon about loyalty. Loyalty is a quality that often seems yet even more tenacious than love itself. Once you establish a loyalty to something, it is very hard to get you to break that loyalty. Loyalty comes from custom, as well as from decision. It can be cultivated and developed through habit and it can be solidified by affirmation.
Never underestimate the power of loyalty. It is possible for people to be loyal to their ignorance as well as to that which edifies. Loyalty is a tenacious attribute. Changing loyalty can be very difficult, and sometimes people will remain loyal to a principle, a relationship or a belief even when it is foolish to do so; even understanding that it is foolish to do so, they continue to do it. Loyalty is understood to be a quality of love, and indeed it is, but it may not be the highest interpretation of love available.
Many communication problems occur because one will hold fast to their belief, even as someone will come along and argue against those beliefs, disdaining that loyalty to an outmoded belief. What this does, rather than incite the person to change beliefs is to incite them to clutch even more vigorously to their premise. Loyalties are not relinquished easily. You were discussing the idea of creationism, for example as compared to evolution, and the high percentage of people on your world, in the Christian faith, that hold tenaciously to the idea of creation as it is set forth in Genesis, even as there are many indications that expand that principle to include the fact of evolution.
Similarly, there are those who, having grown up with organized religion and Sunday church services continue to espouse a loyalty to that agenda, even as the material world grows up around them like tares among the wheat, driving out the need for many to attend formal services as they embrace other concepts of divinity and discover that nature provides a very adequate cathedral for worship and the daily activities of hearth and home and happiness are adequate to express the joy in living that one can credit as having come about because of a relationship with Paradise Trinity.
And so what would seem to some as unfortunate change may seem to others as a fortunate change. We today in this configuration are enjoying what many are calling these days “home church” even as this morning many of you enjoyed formal church services at an official house of worship. But a religious life is similar to marriage between men and women; it is not going away. It will always be there in one form or another because humanity will not do without it. They simply must have their spousal relationship, they insist upon family life, and they insist upon a religious life.
And in fact one which they can share with others, be it in a building or outdoors, be it organized or haphazard, be it formal or informal. Humans spend a lot of time worrying about form over substance. Perhaps if you were to develop more loyalty to the substance and less to the form, you would have less difficulty extricating yourselves from the negative effects of tenacious loyalty to those things which do not deserve loyalty — those things which are now icons of earlier beliefs, even superstitions, but that get dragged into the current mores because of some sense of loyalty to the past.
I bring this up today to remind you that there are those who will hold fast in courageous loyalty to that which they hold up as the ideal that all men should follow. Even when you find it ridiculous, absurd, outdated, or immaterial, they still find value therein, and to renounce it without regard to their devotion is to exacerbate the situation, is to alienate those you would embrace. You cause them to dig their heels in deeper to that of which they will not let go.
And so it is essential that you be tolerant and tactful in dealing with those who — out of a sense of loyalty — hold onto beliefs that no longer serve the greater good. As long as they are serving that individual, that individual’s beliefs need to be respected … or, if not the belief itself, the individual’s right to believe, for to them that is humanly sacred. As religionists and as teachers you cannot go around pulling the rug out from under others without giving them something else to stand on first. As they have been provided something of substance upon which to stand, if they have their footing and a hand to h old, they are more likely to step out from the timidity that keeps them in a state of resistance to higher truth.
This is the meat of the mota about tact and tolerance. You simply must have tact and tolerance; without it, you are ineffective. And yet, it is a practice, a discipline to learn how to apply yourself to the cause of advancement without that charm of personality that will enable you to garner the support of others. This is the purpose of charm of personality, which is the result of graciousness, which emanates from the love-saturated soul. It is the substance of the principle that you can catch more flies with honey than with vinegar, even though vinegar is perceived to be deliciously biting and cutting the face of such cloying and saccharine beliefs as would hold you in the quagmire of yesteryear.
And so again I wish to say how much we appreciate your efforts, for advancing humanity does require effort, even if it is simply holding your tongue when you want to cut through the shadows to the light of truth. You encounter this kind of perplexity often in your lives and I cannot say what to do under any specific circumstance; only you can determine that as you work with your own Adjuster in seeking to express divine values. But we are always willing to support your efforts to improve your consciousness of this teaching technique.
That will conclude my little lecture for the afternoon, the formal portion of our gathering. I would love to hear from you. There are others in attendance, and there is time on the agenda to investigate your concerns, if you have any you would like to share with the others. The floor is open.
Dialogue
Group: Thank you, Tomas.
TOMAS: Before we go too far, let me say “Happy Birthday” to Paula. It is not everyone who greets the sun on a 90 year anniversary of life, and so a doff of the hat to you, dear daughter, for your dedication to the art of living such that you have been rewarded with longevity all these years, and good cheer!
Paula: Thank you very much.
Elena: There are a lot of things in that lesson that were apropos to today, Tomas, and I thank you for that; I really appreciated that.
For the tact part in the loyalty about trying to get something through or to improve things, I’m looking at my experience and frequently, at work for instance, people think that I’m too nice about comments, etc., so tact is important, and over the years, I think it’s the only way that group could have gotten to a better place — and I do think it is at a better place — but I would like you to talk a little bit more about tact in that respect.
All things, I guess, in moderation, right? Or if you are trying to increase your progress, tact is really important, but I am very often tempted to not be tactful, and from people’s comments that I’m too nice, I think maybe I should be more forceful, or commanding, so any further discussion about that particular part …
TOMAS: Certainly. Let’s investigate. You are in a position of authority, and therefore you are given tasks to perform and it falls upon you to motivate those under your command to perform such that the job gets done. It is rather cut and dried, in your case at point. It is not so much an emotional issue as a production issue. What have their beliefs to do with the job?
Elena: Well, it’s interesting that … maybe I should make it more cut and dried. I don’t believe it is cut and dried, however, because with the unions and personal feelings and personal health situations and all of those, it seems anything but cut and dried, but maybe I should make it a little more cut and dried.
Renault: (Indistinguishable question) They will want to leave work, or what?
Elena: Well, there are people with health situations that keep them from producing as much as others, and that gives rise to resentment that some people do more than others, and somebody will be consistently late but with the economic situation, we lost a person and so there are fewer people and so there is the situation of trying to motivate someone and still maintaining a pleasant place to work, rather than cracking a whip.
TOMAS: Is someone cracking a whip over you?
Elena: No. Not yet.
TOMAS: Are these people making excuses for themselves?
Elena: No, they are just not performing up to the norm.
TOMAS: And who has established the norm?
Elena: I guess that would be an average of all the performance put together.
TOMAS: Are you Human Resources?
Elena: No, I’m not.
TOMAS: Is there a Human Resources department?
Elena: Yes, but they’re very … so far they have not been very active or supportive of new departments and we’re not there yet. But back to tact. That was what I was kind of curious about. About measuring that tack with forcefulness.
Men-O-Pah: I noticed that comment Tomas made about honey over vinegar for catching more flies and I believe that’s true. Vinegar never catches anything. So I urge you to be nice, the way you are. Going to the other extreme doesn’t motivate people any more, and probably less.
TOMAS: I would suggest that being kind and gracious is a tactic worth keeping, but you can be straightforward with these people, especially when you are addressing them one on one. Since you are personable, if you were to talk to them as if they were your teenage child, helping them understand the adult perspective and gaining their loyalty to the project, in terms of what their efforts mean to the group as well as the project, such that you have cultivated and developed a team spirit, it helps nurture the community aspect for, as you know, ten people working together can do so much more than ten people individually applying themselves. That synergy has great power.
Some tact and tolerance in their personal quirks might garner some benefits in terms of the ability for them to overlook some of those personal eccentricities in the interest of the project at large. See if you can cultivate in them some kind of loyalty to which they can assign themselves. You are the coach. You have a team. You want them to win the game. You want them to be the best they can be so they can win the pennant and go home victorious. Incorporate the concept of play along with work so that they come in with an attitude of “can do” and “want to.”
When you have a thread or a theme such as this, it’s easier to be tactful because you can address them in allegorical terms. You can speak to them in terms of parables or illustrations instead of specifics, and this will speak to something deep within them that will stir them on to perform for themselves. It is something bigger and more important within them than it is for you or the job or the coworkers, thus they personally have an opportunity to embrace a loyalty to an urge to act in a way that brings out in themselves things that they might not have sought to see and find and fulfil without your assistance.
And always and ever remember to give them an “Atta boy!” “You go, girl!” when you see them applying themselves with focus. There is so much animal training involved in dealing with humans, in situations that call for them to perform in a certain manner. And mistake not, working on a job for a living is not that much different than working on a job for the development of civilization. Good work habits are good work habits, whether it is working for the home team or world peace.
Tact comes from having a sense of affection not only for the whole but for the individual parts and each part is important to the whole. Try to cultivate some of that sense of loyalty to the mutual unified effort and get to it through their own integral contribution.
Remember, too, you are a woman, and you will need to perceive how it is that your strings are being played because of that fact.
Elena: I don’t understand what you’re saying. I understood all the other part, but …
TOMAS: Well, I did open up a new can of worms there. If you understand your people, you can see/perceive, perhaps, how they deal with you professionally and personally as compared to how they deal with their mother, their sister, their daughter. Have they found women to be easy? To be manipulate-able? Have they known women to be hard nosed and difficult or soft and easy, for even though they may not be conscious of the way they approach you, they may be approaching you in a way they have been taught, in which case, you need to apply some tact in edifying them as to how it is that you are the same or different from who they like to think you are.
Elena: That’s interesting. I’ll think about that. Okay. Thank you.
Renault: The tact that I use with my co-workers — at the end of a shift, I always thank the aide or the secretary, “Thank you very much for all your help,” or at the time, “Thank you for helping me.” If I have to correct them on something, I try to do it straightforward as to why we needed that blood pressure or what was going on with that patient or why we need to watch out for this or that.
I think the aides really like it when they are treated with that knowledge and respect that they are not just dumb idiots, but are actual co-workers. And that plain level of respect inevitably goes to all my patients and their families in a sort of “love precedes me” in dealing with them and I have found, over 30 years of nursing, we are all the same. There is nobody more or less than anybody else. It’s leveling the playing field, which means “Doctors are not gods, they are only people and they deserve respect but–” or “You can go up and talk to the CEO of the hospital; he’s just another person who cares,” and the response from all of that is that my patients all love me, my co-workers all think I’m great, everybody asks for me, so I don’t really get a lot of guff, except maybe from my supervisors but … you know? And I try to tell people shit rolls down hill so if they are being squeezed, it all comes down to us so just ignore that part; we’re just being squeezed from the top, so just let it go, don’t’ take it so personal.
There are always rifts between people and co-workers and so I always try to avoid getting into any issues or anything like that.
Elena: An important thing, at this time, when we go through politically difficult times without educating people and trying to make a positive difference in that respect, kind of shaping the way that you’re going to deal with people and get them motivated to plug in and part of the whole thing — I’m not against tact. I think nourishing and all those things I use hugely, maybe even too much, but it’s better to be that way and it’s my choice to be that way, but we go into a new era now and trying to reach across those people who are in different camps, and I think that it’s worth talking about how that’s going to be done, and tact, yes! And that clarity, yes. All of these things. But I think it’s important how to use the Supernals’ suggestions on how that can be done. I mean, the loyalty … that’s why I brought this thing up today because you were talking about loyalty to things that maybe shouldn’t be … maybe it’s outdated loyalty and maybe that needs to be reconsidered and changed, so I think tact is particularly important in that.
TOMAS: But again, you cannot force people to change. If you try to manipulate them or coerce them into changing, you will often get them to dig in their heels and make it worse. When you encounter resistance or someone who is working against the grain, or who has blinders on as to what you feel is needed for the overall good, take them aside and in good faith ask them what they are thinking when they approach the task — not to judge their actions, but to find out what motivates them, what compels them, what inspires them. Why did they do it that way? And when you find out, when they tell you why the did it the way they did it, then you have a foothold on how you can move it along or turn it around to work better for the needs of the current situation.
Perhaps their tactics, their techniques, are not wrong for general purposes but for this specific purpose it doesn’t work, and so trying to get them to change en toto isn’t necessary; perhaps they only need to modify for this specific, and therefore they can hold onto their loyalties in most things, but as it affects the task over which you have some authority and control, you need to have it understood this way, and specify how it is that it needs to be done in order to work for the project you are undertaking with them in tow.
Elena: But, you see, I am looking at this not only from at work but in a much wider perspective, too, so it’s not just work. It’s other arenas, so I found this session helpful. Thank you.
TOMAS: You are welcome. What else is going on in your material world that you would benefit from some divine counsel or supernal wisdom?
Renault: I need divine intervention. I need a renter for the apartment. Soon. The right people.
TOMAS: I have heard you, over the years, being impatient with the universe and it has always, always come through —
Renault: I know. I know.
TOMAS: –with the right timing, the right job, the right builder.
Renault: Right. I know.
TOMAS: It always happens.
Renault: I’m so grateful.
TOMAS: So, fear not.
Renault: Thank you. Okay. Okay. I know you’re working hard.
Elena: Well, it’s a critical time, with all the political stuff going on, and I wonder if — if the topic, just on what you said to Renault, you know, it’s always come true. It’s always been alright. I keep telling myself that, too, actually, regarding the President, and the Congressmen, although I pray every single day for the right combination of wisdom, courage, commitment, loving understanding, openness to Father, those are all things I pray every single morning, going out of the house, and so I suppose the main thing is to maintain our knowledge of what we have had in our own lives to know that everything will be all right, although, you listen to the news and this is almost unprecedented in its scope and capacity and so one wonders sometimes, is it different, or is it just another instance of … I don’t know. I can’t describe it. Is this something totally new? Or not?
TOMAS: There are some things that are totally new, yes, and some things that are as old as time itself. There have always been disasters of one kind or another. They weren’t always known to you, to humanity, because there was not the mass media you have today, and there was not always such an interest in global events. Until recently the populace really only cared about its own turf and were happy to let government take care of things as long as it didn’t interfere with their own life style. Now that has been blown wide open and people are interested in what’s going on in their government; they are getting an eye full of what has been prevailing in the country and abroad and so there are new perspectives, a new sense of alarm and this has given rise to renewed emotionality in the broadcasting.
Also, technology has contribute to the melee because cameras and reporters can go into places that were off limits even ten years ago, making the news far more immediate and ferocious, in fact, actually in the “good old days” your imaginations were left to carry the disasters to the nth degree and now you have cameras doing that for you. And so it might seem to be worse but it is not worse. It’s the same old thing.
Elena: I’m glad to hear you say that. Thank you.
Men-O-Pah: I remember the days of FDR. His program was a bail-out, only not on such a grand a scale as the one now. But it put people to work and trained people; they gave out food stamps and– never money, but fed them somehow so (inaudible) so this experience that we are having now is on a grander scale, and yet it’s not altogether different.
TOMAS: Furthermore, throughout time, civilizations have come into being and faded away; they rise and fall, and that will continue until such time as civilization is settled all over the globe in a relative state of light and life. They who are our enemy today will be our friends tomorrow and vice versa. Those who are empowered today will be slaves tomorrow and vice versa. This is part of the churning and mixing of the human condition to allow ways of change to come and go, ever and anon improving circumstances for greater and greater numbers of people.
Those who want to settle down and avoid change are in for disappointment (group laughter) because it is a very tumultuous time and it will continue to be for some time, but it is also a thrilling time, a very exciting time. It is not simply bad news and disaster. It’s just that bad news and disaster is what is publicized. At the same time, there is a groundswell of humanity reaching out and up to embrace one another in the spirit, such as we are doing here today, such as you do in your efforts, in your outreach efforts, and it too is greater than it has ever been and yet it is still the same, for there have always been those who seek to help others, who depend on God for their livelihood and their mental health, their peace of mind, their motivation.
Try to remember those who, like yourselves, are working for enlightenment of all, who are working with the angels in planetary development, for one of those many fields of endeavor that you discussed with Andromadeus last year. Those efforts are ongoing, unabated, ever active, cross-fertilizing with the workers in the field such as yourselves. This is the reality upon which we ask you to focus and give your loyalty. It is the heart of today and of tomorrow. It will last beyond nations; it will endure beyond centuries; it will sustain beyond tomorrow, it will endure beyond next door. It will provide for you the foundation upon which you may stand as you seek to serve in the fields that you are shown, where you are led, by those On High who rule in the kingdoms of men. Establish your loyalty on this foundation and you have nothing to fear.
Are there other issues?
Renault: In spite of it all, I remain optimistic. I just don’t let them get me down, you know? And there was saying in Jesus’ day: “This too shall pass.” I try to ignore the bad news and listen to the good news and there’s quite a bit of that around, so I’m optimistic. Of course, I am a Pollyanna.
TOMAS: You are a faith child.
Paula: Years ago I worked in a big office. We did mortgage loans. There were 20-some of us working with that department and somebody said, when I went there to work, “Oh, you are not going to like that because of all the petty little things that are going to go wrong and people will quarrel.” That never happened! And I worked there for, oh, I guess four years before I got married and I had a lot of friends there and we got along beautifully. We really did.
Renault: Did you give out a lot of mortgages?
Paula: Oh, yeah. And those were tough times, too, and people were having trouble keeping them up and paying each month, but somehow, someway, they managed. And we had some of the men who handled it, you know. We just helped out. They did the big job and they managed beautifully. They would talk to these people and kind of buck them up a little bit and make them feel a little better, a little stronger, and I enjoyed it there. I learned a lot and I wasn’t enthusiastic about it, but I enjoyed working with these people. We stayed friends for years. And that was a long time ago! I don’t know where they all are now. Probably not in the land of the living anymore.
Closing
TOMAS: I’ll spend one moment on that note, attempting to buck up those of you who tend to flounder and flail about with one mortal failing or another, all of you grow weary. All of you are vulnerable to the flesh. Each of you has an Achilles heel and emotional soft spots. All of you grow weary. Everyone gets discouraged. All of you have an opportunity to reflect on what you don’t have, and yet you have the will to turn that around and recognize what you do have: the courage, the knowledge, the understanding, the instinct, the intuition, the wisdom, the will to persevere, to ride it out, to see it through, to ride the wave, to fly the flag, to do the deed, to see the job done. You have the capacity to turn it around and be of good cheer, for even when you can’t there is one in you that can, and will, if you succumb to that strength, that enduring strength within, that is our origin and our destiny, that uphold s the universe, that surrounds us, that assists us and loves us. Holy, holy, holy. Amen and farewell.
