1993-01-14-Celestial Discovery Group, Part 1 – Session 52
Sarasota #52
01/11/1993
NOTE: THE FOLLOWING SESSION TRANSMISSIONS CAME FROM THE EFFORTS OF PRACTICING AND LEARNING TO T/R AND LEARNING TO TRUST ONESELF AND THE CELESTIAL EFFORTS TO COMMUNICATE WITH THE MORTAL MIND AND DEMONSTRATES THE PROCESS.
Session 52
§ CELESTIAL IMPRESSIONS 52
§ THURSDAY, JANUARY 14, 1993 (EVENING)
Dialogue
We begin by going into the stillness to allow our energies to soften and meld, after we express our prayers of thanksgiving and our invitation to the teachers and unseen helpers, and our willingness to be of service.
Patije: This is Patije. I am enjoying the energy that is going around and around and around us. I want to invite the teachers and tell them I am willing to be used in any way.
Allene: This is Allene and I would like to welcome all the teachers. I would like to thank
MICHAEL and ???? I’d like to thank Rayson and Mary for they have given me ???? I am open. I am willing. I am ????
Drue: This is Drue and I give thanks to all of our unseen helpers and for everyone in this room! I, too, am willing and ready to serve in whatever capacity is right for me.
Mary: This is Mary. I am open and willing to learn and to serve in whatever service is necessary. (too soft to hear all) ??? to thank you, Father, the teachers and ???? (can’t hear rest)
Roy: This is Roy. I, too, welcome the teachers and thank them for all ????(too soft to hear).
(long silence)
Patije: There is so much peace here tonight. Allene: I don’t know where this is coming from, but I hear “Little One, you are indeed different.” (long silence)
RAYSON: (Mary)This is Rayson and I am with you.
Group: Good evening, Rayson.
RAYSON: You feel my energy? (pause)
Voice from the Group: Sure do.
Allene: Thank you very much, Rayson, for all the work you and Mary do.
RAYSON: You are welcome. (pause then says something else too soft to hear on tape, which brings laughter)
Allene: I have been.
RAYSON: You see, and you know how it really feels.
Allene: Is there anything that you would like to share with us this evening, Rayson?
RAYSON: There is much work that is going on with you now. You are being healed.
Drue: Thank you.
RAYSON: (too soft to hear)
Patije: Try to speak a little louder, please?
Mary: This is Mary. I sound like I am screaming!
Patije: I know, that is why I reminded you. I always feel that way too.
Allene: Well, you’re not.
Patije: I have a very personal question for Rayson: Once upon a time I told God that if he would get me out of the rat race that I would work for him. Within a year I was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis. About ten years ago I said that if I could walk again, I would never again complain about my weight. Now, I want to lose some weight. Is there something wrong with me?
RAYSON: God is all loving, all knowing and you have free will in your life.
Patije: I am happy to be healthy, but I would like to have more energy.
RAYSON: And, so it is.
Drue: Something I thought of earlier, Patije was “Instead of looking at it as losing weight, it is getting rid of unwanted excess fat” because it just dawned on me that my claim to fame is that I never lose any weight. (laughter) I was trying to explain to myself what I meant by that has nothing to do with excess weight. Excess weight I am very happy to get rid of.
Patije: If you lose it, you will find it again. So, you want to give it away for good. (laughter)
Allene: I found out that the universe seems to be extremely literal. When working with the inner guide meditation, they are very literal. If you think you don’t want to lose something, it makes perfectly good sense to me that the mind understands that we don’t want to lose this. There is something very literal about this process that I don’t understand why but it appears to be. Patije:
This is why I feel like I am trying to contradict a bargain I made once upon a time. I don’t want to fool around with my health and the rest of that. I am very content to be healthy. But, I would love to be back in the clothes that I wore when I came to Florida.
RAYSON: This is Rayson. What you are carrying is excess baggage. Let go.
Patije: I am willing to let go. Can the teachers do something about taking it. It seems to be stuck with me.
RAYSON: You need to ask. Patije: I ask. I’ve asked the Father if he could relieve me of this excess baggage.
RAYSON: You have to work with the Father.
Mary: This is Mary and I was just trying to decide here not too long ago – that 2 years ago, I stopped dieting, stop talking about weight, I couldn’t do anything about it. Now I am not dieting and the weight is just falling off of me. In the last couple of seeks I’ve just dropped. Dropped way off.
Allene: You know, Patije, when Rayson said about letting go, I equate that with not only letting go of weight but letting go of your past life. (too soft to pick up on tape)
Patije: I thought I got rid of it all. I have no emotional ties to that anymore. It cannot cause an emotional reaction in me anymore.
Mary: You still carry it. And, as she said…(too soft)
Patije: So how do I get rid of it?
Mary: We were talking about the Michael Rice forgiveness exercise – that is what started me off getting rid of the baggage. Doing his worksheets. (too soft to hear)
Allene: I don’t under…I’m picking up because I am seeing it connected. I wasn’t picking up that, I’m seeing it connected to a lot of other things that aren’t let go. And, I keep seeing things like I see it and I hear, you know, start with the things ?????? I’m not saying this to tell you how to do it, but ?????(too soft to pick up)
Patije: That’s what I am seeing and why I am trying so desperately to get the work from 1992 out of the way. (long silence)
Allene: But I am picking up that that is not what it is about.
Patije: There is not anything else I am holding on to. Just all that work in the computer room.
Allene: I was going to say, not consciously.
Mary: You are not aware…it is kind of like with Drue and her, the way she eats right and stuff? You are aware of everything around you consciously. Now you need to start dealing with the unconscious stuff. And bring that through.
Patije: But I thought I had done that with all the exercises and prayer work and balancing of my emotions and forgiving every wrong thing in my past life, before Roy came into my life and before this teaching communication and transmission/receiver began! I was so light of heart because all of the burdens were lifted off – until the tapes of these sessions began to stack up and I was the only one who could transcribe them. Having poor equipment caused me to spend many more hours on each than necessary… and once I got behind I fear I will never catch up.
Drue: I think this is a wonderful group to help all of us, and to support each and every one of us. As each one of us steps out and gets on with whatever it is in life that we need to get on with and get rid of whatever it is in life that is pulling us back and is not a benefit to us. Each one of us has a little different something!
Allene: We’ve all got something.
Drue: And, we’ve all got something, otherwise we wouldn’t be here. (laughter) We’d be long gone! We’d be singing in the Angelic Choir.
Patije: Oh, you are the choir director, by the way. (laughter) You know what they told us the other night.
Allene: I am sitting here, Rayson – and Mary while you two were working on me, I am sitting here marveling not understanding, knowing how much was done. It is such an amazing fashion, with such rapture…
RAYSON: We’re moving too fast for you, eh? (laughter)
Allene: At this moment I was thinking about how much I got, something else is moving and nobody has even touched me.
Patije: Rayson must have spent some time in Canada! (finishing his statements with the “eh” sometimes.)
Allene: Rayson would you have anything that you would like to give us, perhaps to practice on or think about during the week?
Drue: In Accordance with our pact to share anything we think we hear, or see, or picture, I hear “work on myself” (unclear) Mary: I didn’t hear anything there.
Patije: You were trying too hard.
Allene: Yeah, you were trying too hard. Mary: I was trying too hard.
Allene: You can see it – it goes right away to somebody else. Thank you, Drue. I think they will not let anything stand in error.
Drue: I felt it was good advice anyway. (laughter)
Allene: But if Rayson wanted to come in and say that’s not what he had in mind, he would have overridden what you had to say.
Drue: OK
Mary: Not only that but the healing energy is so intense right now, so I know he is with us.
Patije: I heard the little voice say: Ruby:”He would tell!” “He would tell!” “He would tell!” (laughter)
Drue: That must be Ruby!
Allene: You know what Ruby reminds me of? Remember that program You Bet Your Life and a little bird comes down and repeats it “He would tell!” “He would tell” “He would tell!” like “Busy, busy, busy!” This little bird every once in a while comes down with his wings.
(Roy speaks but I can’t hear it)
Patije: The thought came to me that we should send some supportive love to the Maryland group who is getting started.
Allene: Yeah, Seabrook. (long silence while we do this)
RAYSON: This is Rayson and I am back. The message was “letting go”. (laughter)
Mary: I said “No, that’s my imagination.” He said “No, it is not!” (laughter)
Allene: Maybe he delivered that message to the Maryland group and got back already!
Mary: And, he’s telling me: “Mary, Lighten up.” (Roy is talking but I can’t hear him.)
Mary: He can do that I am sure.
Allene: I have the feeling that all of our other teachers are here this evening, sitting back and waiting. Now that we are so…
Mary: Rayson has told me that we have to sit back now and let the other teachers comer through but nobody else comes through.
Allene: Because we have been so enthralled with the new experience with Rayson.
(Roy says something but I can’t hear it on tape)
Mary: Rayson is just sending healing energy to everybody. I can’t get my hands off.
Patije: I heard Welmek say that they are well pleased with our carrying forth with the assignments.
Mary: Ahhhh
Patije: I don’t think VanEssa is here tonight.
Allene: I know something has been going on in this part of my head.
Mary: He is chuckling now and says – it is your baggage.
Allene: There goes my brain! (laughter)
(Roy talks but it cannot be picked up)
Allene: This is the same place that I felt when I got home the other night. When I started to feel . ..(fades out)
(Roy and Mary are talking about something while (and after)
Allene is talking but I can’t pick it up.)
Allene: You know what is interesting with this whole situation with my mother? I got those lessons from Michael…(fades out) acceptance?.. and some other lessons from Aflana. Then with Rayson the other night, working with the old tapes, when I went home the other night it’s like I wasn’t waiting for those things to hit the fan, I just walked in and said: “Ok, this is not my problem. I don’t mean to be unkind. We made a deal and I have done nothing different than what our deal was.” I came in . ..(fades out) Talk about unconditional love and you just throw that out the window. You want to be just half way decent (talking about the old way it was dealt with) I didn’t do anything intentionally. I kept my end of the bargain and if she wants to go off and torture herself, then I don’t have to get out of balance over it……(fades out again)
(Roy and Mary say something but I can’t hear either one)
Allene: I’m not. I’m just observing it. I’m not experiencing….(Roy says something, Mary answers, can’t pick up)
Allene: Had this happened a couple of months ago, let me tell you, I would have been way off balance. Patije will tell you.
Patije: I’ve talked you through several of them. Your mother got me a little off balance about 3:00 in the morning this time!
Mary: ummmmmm
Allene: You know when I don’t accept it it has to go somewhere.
Mary: I think it was meant to be though, because she was not in a place where she could have talked to her. Because she was here going through this big old vacuum cleaner of healing.
Allene: At that point nobody can talk to her..because until she opens her heart you cannot carry on a conversation. When that wall comes up that is it! If you step in you are in a trap.
(conversation continues but becomes personal)
Mary: Does anybody else have any messages?
Allene: I did find out from Aflana the other night that a lot of this is coming through. (fades out)
Patije: Andrew is here.
Allene: Andrew?
Patije: He is just observing. Wanted to say “hello” but no message.
Group: Hello, Andrew.
Patije: Andrea is here, I think.
Allene: Andrea would make sense, because she is a healer. She is the one who has been teaching that other group about healing. I’ll bet it is Andrea, not Andrew.
Drue: Well, Hello Andrea!
Patije: Maybe it is both of them. We are going to have somebody from Pittsburgh next Monday night.
Mary: Is this where Andrea is from?
Allene: Andrew is from Pittsburgh.
(Roy speaks but can’t hear him)
Mary: Oh, ok. Allene: Andrea was visiting the Indianapolis group and gave a wonderful lesson on healing.
Patije: I don’t feel the energies from the teachers tonight as much as usual. I wonder if they are with us “in person” or only contacting through their long-distance apparatus? I wonder.
Mary: Oh, well, Rayson is here.
Patije: Yes, Rayson is here, I was talking about the others.
Allene: Rayson is here.
Patije: Welmek is here.
Allene: Yes, I heard Welmek before when you said he was pleased with our assignment, he said: “I am very pleased.” a very positive statement.
Mary: Who is sitting on that chair? (she points to an empty chair)
Drue: Rayson, if you are still here, many of us need some more help.
Allene: Well, Rayson told me and Aflana….(too soft) . .. as he get’s rid of the toxins you will be able to pick up and be more centered… (fades out). I received that when I am attuned and adjusted that they will heal all of us, whatever that is. But I tell you, if I get sick, I’m going to go to Dr. Rayson. (laughter) or Dr. Mary and Dr. Rayson.
Roy: Mary Rayson!
Voice: Maray
Mary: Maray?
Allene: As soon as she said that, I liked the sound of that!
Patije: We were trying to come up with her spiritual name the other night and it is so close but we couldn’t quite get it. (pause) “Mary” has been healing in this household. Now we don’t automatically think of Roy’s exwife when we say: “Mary”. (laughter) (long silence) Well, teachers, if you are here, we would like to have a communication or lesson or a message.
Mary: I don’t hear anything until you say something like that and then I hear “I am here!” and I say: “well do what you want to do” and I hear: “I am healing.”
Drue: What I hear is that they are all sitting here in a circle with us and everybody is just so comfortable. It is like on a sunny afternoon and you are sitting around the lake and everybody is just sitting there peacefully together and you don’t really have to say anything, because you are all good friends and you are all there together and sharing the same space. (long, long silence)
Allene: Well, I am just sitting here letting baggage drift (????too soft) I’m not trying to sift it out.
RAYSON: I like to share your space.
Drue: You must be getting ready to do ??? because I am getting very light and I’m going up. (laughter)
Mary: Rayson says he is working on other levels. (too soft to pick up) Allene: That is probably why the teachers are relatively silent)
Mary: And, I am whispering again. I am sorry, people. Can you hear me now?
Patije: I can now, but I didn’t before.
Mary: You didn’t hear what he said about levels? Rayson is here and Rayson is working with us on other levels – on levels that we are not aware of.
Patije: Ok, thank you.
Allene: Well, Rayson,I for one, I’m willing to receive all the help, all the love.
Drue: So am I, Rayson. Thank you. But I am really going up.
Patije: Do you go straight up or do you go in circles?
Drue: I’m going straight up.
Patije: It is like I am on a merry-go-round or spiralling up and around.
Drue: You know the ah..it is sort of like a little elevator, a little seat that you put on the staircase and it takes you up? I’m on one of those but it is going straight up!
(discussion between Allene, Roy and Mary that is not loud enough to hear on tape)
Mary: Rayson is not talking, but I am sharing what I am seeing. I don’t think it is fair not too.
Patije: Mary said a beautiful thing to me the other night. I don’t think she’ll mind if I share it, but I was asking here to share some of her transcripts – being a new transmitter or journaler, or whatever you call it, I asked her if she would share those. She said: “Well, I don’t think they are mine anymore. I think they were given to me to share.” I thought that was so beautiful and so enlightened of her!
Mary: When Rayson works with me in a healing he is such a “Dear Heart ” (too soft)
Drue: We think you are too, Mary.
Allene: You know I can begin to feel…(fades out)
Drue: You know, my spine is so straight now, it feels like all the vertebrae are stacked right on top of one another and stretched the way it is supposed to be.
Mary: There is a profound amount of energy coming into us right now! I’ve not experienced this before.
Voice: I’m finding when I put my hands out they are wanting to go in a North\South direction.
Mary: Maybe we are charging batteries. Patije, your baggage is letting loose.
Patije: Good!
Mary: He is working on levels you are not aware of. (tape turned over)
RAYSON: (Mary)You need to center yourself before your meals.
Patije: How do we do that?
RAYSON: Go into the silence for a minute if you have to. Then you will know that we will be working with you.
Patije: Thank you.
RAYSON: Go with your feelings.
Allene: I got “what you want to eat” is that what you mean? (answer too soft to pick up)
Mary: This is Mary. I think this is what he is telling you to do.
Patije: I suddenly felt a pain right in here.
Mary: You got loose from whatever you were carrying around. (everybody is talking at once)
Drue: When you mentioned the pain in your neck just now? What came to my mind is that you just got rid of the pain in your neck. (laughter)
Patije: Thank you!
Mary: In fact I saw like a thing going out the back of your neck. (long pause) Oh, Roy, I know you don’t want to hear it, (laughter) and I don’t want to tell you (laughter) but….
Patije: Roy, do you have enough courage to ask?
Roy: What is it?
Mary: I just keep seeing your lungs…and your….I don’t know why. He’s not saying anything. I don’t know why.
Allene: I would think about it between now and next week. (laughter)
Drue: What are you looking at, Mary. Are you looking at black lungs? Or are you looking at healthy pink ones?
Mary: Well, they are sort of pink but they have a brown coating inside.
Roy: oooooooooh (can’t hear the rest)
Mary: I can’t quite describe the color – maybe take a little green and add a little black to it and slosh it around together, . …maybe you needed to hear that…
Roy: What is it? (too soft)
Mary: Poison?….(too soft) . …. is fine.
Patije: Something different in the cigarettes?
Mary: I told him they are fine – just a horrible color.
Drue: See what happens…the whole body process is cleansing. Breathing in and breathing out is cleansing. When there is smoke, instead of bringing in clean air you are bringing in more poison so that you body doesn’t have a chance to get this clean stuff that it needs for this cleansing process.
Mary: What I am seeing inside your lungs is (too soft) air pockets and a brown coat of…
Patije: Can you fix it?
Drue: I’ll hold your cigarettes for you.
Mary: I don’t want to interfere with him if he is not ready. I don’t want that to happen again. She is right. What you say is what you get.
Allene: I said: “the decision has already been made.” – But, I had made the decision for my birthday in March – I didn’t intend for it to be immediately.
Mary: She didn’t even get to finish the sentence. When she said the decision has been made – zap! I didn’t even know what was happening. I am sitting there and the energy is coming through me.
Allene: I guess I probably was ready on an unconscious level because I was thinking about it almost every time I smoked a cigarette – except at night when I was busy and like that. I’ve known this was going. So, it was already decided. It may not have been decided –
Mary: Rayson says not to worry. We are not trying to frighten you. (laughter)
(Roy says something but too soft)
Allene: Believe me, if I wasn’t ready I’d… I’m like the old alcoholic, I take it one day at a time. In my mind, I don’t say I’ll never do that again.
Mary: Are you (too soft) He is cleansing you at the energy level. (continues but too soft to pick up) laughter… I’m grateful that Rayson is doing this because I couldn’t hold my hands up this long by myself.
Drue: Well, your little friends are under there holding them up.
Mary: I guess! (laughter) My Chanti! The energy just won’t quit! Whew!
(long silence)
Drue: I get that even our unseen helpers – everyone is just bathing in this relaxed energy. Everyone is soaking it up. They are all sitting around saying “Thank you, so much.” Like a lazy Sunday afternoon.
Patije: I see this too.
Allene: Yeah, I was going to say earlier I see that too.
Mary: oh, wow.
Allene: And here you thought you were just working with simple mortals…sorry about that.
Mary: Somebody is holding my hands and that’s cool.
Allene: No wonder they are so quiet. (long silence again)
Allene: Maybe . ..instead of having a roman bath, they are having a spiritual bath…they go in and sit and get a cleansing, and they don’t have the same kind of body to go and take a bath.
(long silence)
Allene: (Says something else but can’t pick it up.)
Patije: Can we work on my ears? I want to hear. It is not like I want to block it out. Rayson was here at one of the meetings in the spring and I had perfect hearing for about 6 hours. It was wonderful. Of course, everyone who comes to help transcribe can hear nothing on these tapes except static and buzzing and everything is too soft – I do hear a lot on these tapes but it is difficult disregarding the buzzing and static) So maybe I do hear, I’ve just convinced myself I can’t!
Drue: Do you remember ??? who passed away late in her life. She was very very hard of hearing. She used to say: “I’m totally convinced that I am responsible for this because I would say to people I don’t want to hear what they are saying.”
Mary: I just heard somebody say that to me when you said something about your hearing. I saw you saying: “I don’t want to hear it.”
Patije: But I’ve never thought or said that though!
Allene: Yeah, but I was picking up the same thing because I thought this doesn’t make sense.
Mary: this doesn’t make sense because I haven’t heard her say it.
Allene: I haven’t heard her say that either.
Patije: I have never thought it!
Mary: I picked that up as you said that.
Drue: What I heard was not that you don’t want to hear, but that “You have to want to hear.”
Mary: Ahh, that’s right.
Allene: (too soft to hear)
Patije: I notice that when I can’t hear I tend to draw into myself and I don’t do that in these groups. It is the only place I don’t do that. I don’t like large groups “out there” because I end up going into myself and I am only comfortable in small groups. Even when the 28 people were here…
Mary: Perhaps you have programmed yourself that way and when there are more than a few people you automatically go into that mode.
Patije: I try to be aware that I not do that. I am very aware of it and I have done a lot of work on it over the years – especially since I went to Unity School. I don’t want to hear evil. I don’t want to hear bad words. I don’t want to hear violence or threats. I don’t want to hear anger – I will admit that. Is the world so full of it that I am blocking out the world?
Mary: The world is full of it. (too soft to hear the rest)
Patije: I know I don’t enjoy watching television. I don’t want to see the violence and the ugliness. Even the romance is . ..
RAYSON: This is Rayson, and I leave now for awhile.
Drue: Thank you, Rayson.
Allene: Thank you.
Patije: Bye, Rayson.
Allene: I was thinking you need to be aware but not attached to things that are ugly to you.
Patije: Oh, I am aware there is a war going on, I am aware that there is crime, I am aware that there are people who are starving but I am not emotionally attached to it. I just don’t want to permeate my thinking with it so I don’t bother to sit and watch television all the time like that. I think I’ve don’t a pretty good job of handling myself and keeping myself healed but I don’t understand the hearing. I can understand weight because I said: “Look, I won’t ever complain about my weight again, if I can walk.” I meant it with all my heart. I’m hearing myself complaining about my weight…
Allene: Yeah it is not a static universe anyway, Patije.
Mary: No, you see I got that that was not a thing . ..
Allene: Patije, . ..(too soft) (Mary and Allene talking at the same time)
Patije: Logically I understand it, emotionally…but the hearing I don’t because I have never wanted to close my hearing off from anything. I’ve never had a reason to say: “Oh don’t tell me that” because I’ve always said “tell me more” unless it is because I wanted to hear from the inner instead of the outer and I’ve concentrated on that so much that the outer has quit!?
Mary: Sometimes you don’t have that problem.
Allene: I was going to say, I wondered if it is because you are trying to work on the computer and people are calling you and all. Maybe there is a part of you that says enough is enough?
Patije: That is not the way I feel! I love the phone calls! I love being in these groups. (pause) It is a symptom of MS – for the hearing to turn off when it is tired. However, I am not expressing any other symptoms of MS…
Allene: But you have been dealing with too much…and you haven’t been yourself the last 3 or 4 days at all. So, maybe that is what it is. Well, I mean I notice it more the last 3 or 4 days. So maybe that is what is happening and the body has had enough – like that time I went home and slept for 2 days. When the body has it, it starts to shut down.
Patije: That is what it was doing 2 weeks ago, but I’m up again now with…
Allene: umhmmm
Patije: I know when I get caught up in the computer room I’ll feel really good!
Mary: You’re getting there.
Patije: So far the help that has come, is helpful but they don’t type, don’t know computers, they don’t transcribe – and that is where I am behind – and then I have that transcribing machine which is just about useless…..
Allene: By the way, . ..(too soft too hear)
Patije: Everything works together for good. I know that. And, I’ve demonstrated it many times in my life experience.
Mary: I was going to say, you certainly do show that to work well for you.
Allene: I have this thing, Drue, about this letter…about whether to put it out on a subscription basis, and then possibly as a love offering basis. It is not a simple decision. After talking to Patije and then I talked to Roland who was here, and then it all came together and I said: “OK, I would do it as a donation” and then when this came in I thought “Well, ok that is the first seed money and I started an account for that.” (gets too soft to hear)
Drue: (too soft to hear)
Patije: Well, I just spent $88 today for a toner. It is a never ending battle. (laughter)
Allene: Well, you know the other thing, Patije, is you really have to, you know, ask for what you want, you really have to let people know what it costs.
Patije: I tell anyone who asks, but I don’t require money from anyone. Some people generously give.
Mary: I have always felt bad about that because “How much does she put in there?” I don’t have any idea.
Patije: Well, you know if you break it down per copy, per sheet of paper, I don’t know what it is – $.10 or $.12 but it is all those I throw away getting the complete one that hasn’t been messed up by a used toner…
Mary: That is what I am saying. Find out the cost and let . ..
Allene: Yes, let people know what it costs!
Patije: There isn’t any way to tell. I went through 3 toners since Christmas and they run $100. new. You can get them for $74 at Office Depot now. And, we found a place that will refill then for $44, but some say you should not do that to your printer, so I don’t know if that is going to cost me more in the long run. (The one time I used a refill it only made 1100 copies – normally I get 8 or 9 reams of paper printed.)
Mary: What I am saying is that you should add it all up and see.
Patije: For 1992, I totalled up everything I spent on these Urantia things and with everything (donation) sent to me, I still spent $641 more than I received. That was subtracting my own 10% tithe from the cost and still there was $641 over. I spent a lot of money. When we had 28 people there were at least 20 copies times 30 pages, each week just for our group and then I sent some out…
Allene: And, coffee.
Patije: I didn’t count coffee, or the Urantia “Mustard Seeds” and such that people took from the Urantia room. Sometimes people brought coffee.
Drue: I think it was very confusing because in the beginning, they kept saying “no money” and then one time when I tried to make an announcement to throw donations in a jar for Patije’s expenses, boy, I was cut off like there was no tomorrow!
Patije: I think she missed the whole point of the whole lesson. I couldn’t undo it because when I tried I was told that it was coming from me, not the teachers – I was being greedy. I understood the teachers to tell us we are not to charge anybody for anything spiritual. There was no directive not to have people leave a donation to cover the costs of producing the copies for them, but I gave it to the Father and knew that he would see that I had the money I needed to keep up his work. And, he did.
Mary: There was nothing wrong for you to say: “I spent x number of $ for toner, paper, whatever and you all need to help me pay for it.
Patije: I did! You know what they would say to me? “Your printer is not cost efficient, there are printers which do better than that.” or “I wouldn’t share your personal stuff if I were you. Then it wouldn’t cost so much to copy them.” or…
Allene: But, they were very happy to take it!
Mary: They accepted it, and didn’t help you?!?
Allene: This is one of the reasons that I kept a list like when I sent out the newsletter to these people, I kept the postage, I kept how many copies I sent out, how much it cost to run off the copies, I keep all of this information then at some time down the road, either it is self-generating, or it isn’t and in the newsletter I can say I’ve been doing this for so many months, I am so much ahead, thank you very much or I am so much behind, if you’d like this to continue I need help. But then you’ve got it exactly down. It is not an estimate, it is not a guess, it is like a real clear cut thing. And, I don’t mix it with my money. That is real separate for accounting. Just like a business. Otherwise, for me, I feel badly if I ask people for money and I’ve gotten it all mixed up and I’m not sure how much it really cost or how much of my money and…I’m not comfortable with that so I keep it.
Mary: But she is into this now.
Allene: I understand, but I am telling her to keep track of it.
Patije: I know exactly what I spent. I just told you $641 more than my 10% tithe and the money I received last year.
Mary: Now you need a way of telling everybody. Hey guys, I need $20 from you and you…(fades out)”
Patije: I can’t do that.
Mary: Why?
Patije: I can’t do that anymore than you could take money for healing. It has got to be a love offering. It has to come from the person who is getting the value or it is not worth it.
Mary: But healing is different. I don’t have to open my purse to do it.
Allene: That is an interesting point!
Mary: It doesn’t cost me anything. I am giving of my time. I will get in my car and go over wherever I need to be if I am not working.
Patije: If you were doing it everyday, how much money would you be spending for gas?
Mary: I don’t count that. I’m not having to go in and get my purse to pay so much for copies and whatever. I think that is very material.
Patije: Well, that is the difference. I get help, but not enough to pay for all of the expenses.
Mary: That is expensive stuff.
Allene: I guess my point is that I understand a lot how you feel about, you know, getting money for something. It is one thing to charge for something, it is another thing, you know, for what the expenses are, and what somebody is benefiting from. I mean I know I’ve run up a tab with Patije because I haven’t been able to even pay my…
(Roy and Mary talking about how much is being spent for paper and cassette tapes and toners as well as the equipment needing to replaced) but it is too soft to pick up)
Allene: You heard me say this when I first came here. I belonged to a church and it is a very very wealthy community and had 3 services on Sunday. They wanted to build a new church and the minister would not let us ask for money at all in any form. It was going to be a church that love would build. I was on the finance committee. We had wonderful people on the committee for the ideas but we couldn’t use any of them because they had to do with money.
I went to the board meeting as a new member and I said I don’t understand why you won’t talk about money because it takes US dollars to go down to the bank, to buy the materials. We should get up and say this is what you want, what it is going to cost, and ask for what we needed. The minister wanted people to give the money without being asked. Because they had not been asked they assumed none was needed. As soon as you tell people it is going to cost 2 million dollars, and this is what we need, I guarantee you people would have written checks all over the place.
But nobody asked them, so they assumed that we had the money. The point is the same thing. If you ask. It is one thing to say you had to buy toners, but that is skirting the issue. That is not coming out and saying: “Guys I need.”
Mary: You should say: “It is costing me x# $ . ”
Patije: Well, I brought it up one night…
Drue: We have to find people who are willing to foot the expenses because Patije has devoted her entire life to doing this work. She is giving all of herself, she should have help for the cost of it. (Roy said something but tape didn’t pick it up)
Drue: Absolutely everything! You people have people sleeping on your sofas! (laughter)
Roy: Everybody is coming down to get out of the cold…
Patije: No, Roy, they are coming to be taught about what is going on. We have been told we are a teaching center – and our first assignment is to teach new transmitters how to relax and flow with it. Anybody coming for that reason is welcome in my home. I will turn none away.
(tape ends. Another tape had to be hunted and by the time a new tape was put in, the session had ended)
(One of the teachers had mentioned something about enjoying our conversation and the healing energy. Then Drue led us in a song)
